The shocking treatise that was a bestselling international media sensation upon its 2007 publication in France now makes its eagerly anticipated English-language debut.A mother of two herself, Maier makes her deadly serious, if at times laugh-out-loud-funny, argument with all the unbridled force of her famously wicked intellect. In forty to-the-point, impressively erudite chapters drawing on the realms of history, child psychology, politics, and the environment, Maier effortlessly skewers the idealized notion of parenthood as a natural and beautiful endeavour. Enough with this "baby-mania” that is plaguing modern society, says Maier, it's nothing but brainwashing. Are you prepared to give up your free time, dinners with friends, spontaneous romantic getaways, and even the luxury of uninterrupted thought for the "vicious little dwarves” that will treat you like their servant, cost you hundreds of thousands of dollars, and end up resenting you? Speaking to the still "child-free”, to fellow suffering parents, and to adamant procreationists alike, No Kids is a controversial, thought-provoking, and undeniably entertaining read. Reasons to avoid having kids:•You will lose touch with your friends•Your sex life will be over•Children cost a fortune•Child-rearing is endless drudgery•Vacations will be nightmares•You'll lose your identity and become just "mom” or "dad”•Your children will become mindless drones of capitalism•The planet's already overcrowded•Your children will inevitably disappoint you

PrologueIntroduction40 GOOD REASONS NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN1. The “desire for children”: A silly idea 2. Labour is torture3. You avoid becoming a walking pacifier4. You keep having fun5. Rat race plus rugrats: No thanks!6. You keep your friends7. You won’t have to use that idiot language when talking to kids8. Open the nursery, close the bedroom9. Kids are the death of desire10. Kids are the death knell of the couple11. To be or to do: Don’t decide12. “The child is a sort of vicious, innately cruel dwarf” (Michel Houellebecq)13. Kids are conformists14. Kids are a treasure, and will cost you one15. Kids are unbiased allies of capitalism16. A brain teaser: How to keep kids busy17. The parent’s worst nightmares18. Don’t be fooled by the “ideal child” illusion19. Your kid will always disappoint you20. The horror of becoming a merdeuf21. Parent above all? No, thank you22. Keep the experts at bay23. The family: A horror24. Don’t revert to childhood25. It takes real courage to keep saying, “Me first”26. Kids signal the end of your youthful dreams 27. You can’t stop yourself from wanting your kids to be happy28. You can’t get away from your kids29. Get used to it: School is a boot camp30. “Raise” a child . . . but toward what?31. Avoid benevolent neutrality like the plague32. Parenthood is a sad, sweet song33. Motherhood is a trap for women34. Motherhood or success: Pick one35. When the child appears, the father disappears36. Today’s child is the perfect child: Welcome to the best of all possible worlds37. Danger, child ahead38. Why wear yourself out for a future that doesn’t include you?39. There are too many children in the world40. Reject the ten absurd commandments of the “good” parentConclusion